I am not going to obsess about work today. I am not going to do research. I am going to chill out and think my own thoughts for one damn day.
And read a book about a Zombie Apocalypse.
Wednesday, April 11, 2012
Tuesday, April 10, 2012
Another Difficult Subject
I had a really good night on Monday. Considering the last week, I feel slightly reassured. Either I am able to adapt to the needs of my job or my favorite supervisor has settled down again. Since I did not speak to any regulars last night, I am betting on the former. In fact, my paranoid little self is imaging some evil bastard stationed in the call center deliberately connecting me to the worst callers available and cursing my name every time I manage to turn these jerks' fantasies into a decent length call. Instead of talking to regulars, I got stuck tap dancing my way through Pedophile night.
My first call was just talking to another Canadian; mostly about travel. He still managed to be pretty sleazy but, he didn't want to argue about politics, call me vile names, or have me order him to masturbate with a Brillo pad. I'll put him down in my log book as a good caller for not wanting that last one alone. The next one wanted to talk about how much he loves to fuck little boys. He didn't give me details, thank god but, I did have to listen to his vile bullshit and make appreciative listening sounds at strategic moments. I wonder if he knows that the hosting company monitors calls and records anything that sounds illegal. The second one started with 'I want to fuck my 3 year old niece.' When I failed to make an appreciative noise right after hearing that charming statement, he hung up. The third one asked if I had any young girls living with me. I have spoken to this fucking creepazoid before. That particular caller is looking for a woman crazy enough to pimp out her very young daughters. This caller also lives in the same city I do. Oh, lucky me. My answer? "Sorry, no." My rule of thumb when dealing with Pedophile callers is simple. If they do the talking, I'll listen and make acceptable active listening noises. If they expect me to tell a story about how I really want to watch a child getting fucked by them, they are out of luck. I just can't do it and no, I'm not really trying. It is one of the few aspects of human sexuality where I have not done a great deal of research reading. I did try. There are some erotica sites that will post stories that involve pedophilia but, I can't stomach them.
The fourth one started out as a Delightfully Raunchy and descended into grossness after the first ten minutes. The caller claimed to be a porn actor who was having a hard time (no pun intended) settling down after a day of shooting. He had called two escorts but, wanted some company while he was waiting for them to arrive. He told me that the secret of his success in porn is because he doesn't find skinny women attractive. He can get hard and stay that way without coming because he is not that physically attracted to his co-stars. Then he started telling me about his personal life. He has 3 children by three different mothers and maintained relationships with his children by maintaining his friendships with their mothers. When he started talking about the fact that one of the women was sexually abused by her father as a girl and he was sure that was why she is such a freak in the bedroom, I knew I was in trouble. He is not the first caller I have spoken to who has made the connection between childhood sexual assault and adult 'slut status'. There is a caller who will only speak to PSOs who admit to being sexually abused as children. He says that they make the 'best sluts' because they will do anything. The thought that there are men who are aware of how much damage sexual assault does to little girls and like it is unbelievably foul to me.
And then there was the last caller. I have spoken to him several times before and enjoyed it. He likes to talk about sex but, he really doesn't want a fantasy or sound effects. His tastes in sex are about as Vanilla as a man can get. He knows I am a Domme; one time he asked what I was into and I decided to test him by telling him the truth. We had a long conversation about how Dommes are portrayed in porn and how for most of us, that is not how we express our sexuality. His response was "Thank god because most of that shit is just fucking weird," and then apologized for insulting me. I laughed so hard I had to force myself to stop to catch my breath.
He's a good old boy from a very small town in the South where there are exactly two major employers; a Walmart Superstore and the small manufacturing plant where he works. He is a single father with a teenage son. His girlfriend split to get something more out of life and left her son behind. She has recently returned and that might be the reason why he has turned to phone sex. She would like to get back together with him. He doesn't want that but, admits that there aren't a lot of single women his age available to date in his area. Like I said, this one just likes to talk. That's why I know so much about this caller.
The reason I am talking about him here? He told me that he has become infatuated with a teenage girl who is a friend of his son's. Those are my words, not his. What he told me is that this girl, who lives nearby, likes to hang out with him and his son while they are working on his truck in his garage. She was there one night about a month ago when he looked up at her and realized that she is starting to develop breasts. He told me that he looked over at her, thought "nice rack", then realized he was ogling a 13 year old girl and felt like a scumbag. The problem is he's thinking about her often and she is always underfoot. They live in the same neighborhood. He and her mother work together and carpool together. The girl goes to school with his son.
He told me that the girl's mother is in a rough spot; she is working full time to support her family and taking care of her recently disabled husband. He asked me if he should try to tell the mother that it's time for her little girl to start wearing a bra. I said yes. As one parent to another, letting the overworked mother know that she might need to have a conversation with her teenage daughter on how to dress appropriately is a good idea. The woman might also choose to have a conversation about a few other subjects at the same time. Considering what he has told me about her life, I would guess that the woman hasn't had a moment to stop and look at her daughter in months. That might be the reason why this girl is hanging out in her neighbors garage.
He asked me what he should do. I told him to stop letting this girl hang out in his garage. That is already happening; his son is on a team and at practice in the afternoon now and his truck has decided to run for the time being. He has also been making a point of going out and trying to meet women closer to his own age (or at least, street legal). He also admitted that he went looking for some sort of support, online.
I know what he found, nothing. There is absolutely no support for a person who has an inappropriate interest in a child and doesn't want to be a pedophile unless that person has already committed the crime and been found guilty. There are no forums, support groups, etc. There are plenty of pro-pedophilia sites available but, nothing for a person who doesn't want to hurt a child. It is not even safe for a person to confide in a counselor. If the counselor decides that the patient is dangerous to a child, the counselor must report it to the police.
The truth is that I don't think that this guy is at risk of becoming a pedophile. The sheer amount of disgust he feels at his own interest is a big part of the reason. Unlike callers who want to hear a PSO support the idea that a teenage girl has the hots for them; he doesn't obsess about her actions, what they mean, and what secret message she is trying to convey to him. He obsesses about his own thoughts and what might be wrong with him. What is wrong is that he lives in a culture that worships youth and engages in the sexualization of children. He lives in a culture that equates sexual beauty with youth. The truth is that men, a whole lot of men, look at young girls and think "yum" without ever acting on those feelings. I think that this caller is more upset at those feelings than most because he is groping his way through parenthood, single parenthood at that, without a hell of a lot of support. God knows I have talked about sex with this guy often enough to know what he finds attractive. He preference is for sexually aggressive brunettes close to his own age which might explain why he's so curious about me being a Domme.
I will probably never know the end of this story. I sincerely hope that this guy finds a girl who introduces him to the joys of bondage using her thigh high stockings so he can to put his "nice rack" thought into context and forget about it. And, I much as I think that adults who rape children should face the death penalty, I also wish that we could find some way to help the ones who want to get help without destroying their lives in the process.
Sometimes I just can't make this crap funny.
My first call was just talking to another Canadian; mostly about travel. He still managed to be pretty sleazy but, he didn't want to argue about politics, call me vile names, or have me order him to masturbate with a Brillo pad. I'll put him down in my log book as a good caller for not wanting that last one alone. The next one wanted to talk about how much he loves to fuck little boys. He didn't give me details, thank god but, I did have to listen to his vile bullshit and make appreciative listening sounds at strategic moments. I wonder if he knows that the hosting company monitors calls and records anything that sounds illegal. The second one started with 'I want to fuck my 3 year old niece.' When I failed to make an appreciative noise right after hearing that charming statement, he hung up. The third one asked if I had any young girls living with me. I have spoken to this fucking creepazoid before. That particular caller is looking for a woman crazy enough to pimp out her very young daughters. This caller also lives in the same city I do. Oh, lucky me. My answer? "Sorry, no." My rule of thumb when dealing with Pedophile callers is simple. If they do the talking, I'll listen and make acceptable active listening noises. If they expect me to tell a story about how I really want to watch a child getting fucked by them, they are out of luck. I just can't do it and no, I'm not really trying. It is one of the few aspects of human sexuality where I have not done a great deal of research reading. I did try. There are some erotica sites that will post stories that involve pedophilia but, I can't stomach them.
The fourth one started out as a Delightfully Raunchy and descended into grossness after the first ten minutes. The caller claimed to be a porn actor who was having a hard time (no pun intended) settling down after a day of shooting. He had called two escorts but, wanted some company while he was waiting for them to arrive. He told me that the secret of his success in porn is because he doesn't find skinny women attractive. He can get hard and stay that way without coming because he is not that physically attracted to his co-stars. Then he started telling me about his personal life. He has 3 children by three different mothers and maintained relationships with his children by maintaining his friendships with their mothers. When he started talking about the fact that one of the women was sexually abused by her father as a girl and he was sure that was why she is such a freak in the bedroom, I knew I was in trouble. He is not the first caller I have spoken to who has made the connection between childhood sexual assault and adult 'slut status'. There is a caller who will only speak to PSOs who admit to being sexually abused as children. He says that they make the 'best sluts' because they will do anything. The thought that there are men who are aware of how much damage sexual assault does to little girls and like it is unbelievably foul to me.
And then there was the last caller. I have spoken to him several times before and enjoyed it. He likes to talk about sex but, he really doesn't want a fantasy or sound effects. His tastes in sex are about as Vanilla as a man can get. He knows I am a Domme; one time he asked what I was into and I decided to test him by telling him the truth. We had a long conversation about how Dommes are portrayed in porn and how for most of us, that is not how we express our sexuality. His response was "Thank god because most of that shit is just fucking weird," and then apologized for insulting me. I laughed so hard I had to force myself to stop to catch my breath.
He's a good old boy from a very small town in the South where there are exactly two major employers; a Walmart Superstore and the small manufacturing plant where he works. He is a single father with a teenage son. His girlfriend split to get something more out of life and left her son behind. She has recently returned and that might be the reason why he has turned to phone sex. She would like to get back together with him. He doesn't want that but, admits that there aren't a lot of single women his age available to date in his area. Like I said, this one just likes to talk. That's why I know so much about this caller.
The reason I am talking about him here? He told me that he has become infatuated with a teenage girl who is a friend of his son's. Those are my words, not his. What he told me is that this girl, who lives nearby, likes to hang out with him and his son while they are working on his truck in his garage. She was there one night about a month ago when he looked up at her and realized that she is starting to develop breasts. He told me that he looked over at her, thought "nice rack", then realized he was ogling a 13 year old girl and felt like a scumbag. The problem is he's thinking about her often and she is always underfoot. They live in the same neighborhood. He and her mother work together and carpool together. The girl goes to school with his son.
He told me that the girl's mother is in a rough spot; she is working full time to support her family and taking care of her recently disabled husband. He asked me if he should try to tell the mother that it's time for her little girl to start wearing a bra. I said yes. As one parent to another, letting the overworked mother know that she might need to have a conversation with her teenage daughter on how to dress appropriately is a good idea. The woman might also choose to have a conversation about a few other subjects at the same time. Considering what he has told me about her life, I would guess that the woman hasn't had a moment to stop and look at her daughter in months. That might be the reason why this girl is hanging out in her neighbors garage.
He asked me what he should do. I told him to stop letting this girl hang out in his garage. That is already happening; his son is on a team and at practice in the afternoon now and his truck has decided to run for the time being. He has also been making a point of going out and trying to meet women closer to his own age (or at least, street legal). He also admitted that he went looking for some sort of support, online.
I know what he found, nothing. There is absolutely no support for a person who has an inappropriate interest in a child and doesn't want to be a pedophile unless that person has already committed the crime and been found guilty. There are no forums, support groups, etc. There are plenty of pro-pedophilia sites available but, nothing for a person who doesn't want to hurt a child. It is not even safe for a person to confide in a counselor. If the counselor decides that the patient is dangerous to a child, the counselor must report it to the police.
The truth is that I don't think that this guy is at risk of becoming a pedophile. The sheer amount of disgust he feels at his own interest is a big part of the reason. Unlike callers who want to hear a PSO support the idea that a teenage girl has the hots for them; he doesn't obsess about her actions, what they mean, and what secret message she is trying to convey to him. He obsesses about his own thoughts and what might be wrong with him. What is wrong is that he lives in a culture that worships youth and engages in the sexualization of children. He lives in a culture that equates sexual beauty with youth. The truth is that men, a whole lot of men, look at young girls and think "yum" without ever acting on those feelings. I think that this caller is more upset at those feelings than most because he is groping his way through parenthood, single parenthood at that, without a hell of a lot of support. God knows I have talked about sex with this guy often enough to know what he finds attractive. He preference is for sexually aggressive brunettes close to his own age which might explain why he's so curious about me being a Domme.
I will probably never know the end of this story. I sincerely hope that this guy finds a girl who introduces him to the joys of bondage using her thigh high stockings so he can to put his "nice rack" thought into context and forget about it. And, I much as I think that adults who rape children should face the death penalty, I also wish that we could find some way to help the ones who want to get help without destroying their lives in the process.
Sometimes I just can't make this crap funny.
Monday, April 9, 2012
Don't Drink The Kool-Aid
The last week has been strange. I thought it was because of the upcoming Easter holiday. It seems that callers tend to scale down their phone sex expenditures before holidays and pick it up again once the holiday passes. I just don't feel like speculating on why at this time. For the past week, I have been getting connected to callers I usually don't speak to or repeatedly connected to callers who Hang Up @ Hello. When I say repeatedly, I mean getting connected to the same caller multiple times in a row. I filed in the back of my mind as weird and plowed ahead.
Saturday, I was placed on call after the first half hour on my shift. My first caller disconnected the call when someone knocked on his front door. I heard him answer the door before hanging up so I believe him when he said he had to go. Not there was anything I could do about it if he had been lying to me. Then I was connected to the same Short Timer over and over again. He used a different name and location for each call but he had a very distinctive speaking voice and asked the same questions each time. He seemed to be very concerned about the age of the PSO and would not say why. After 5 rounds of this bullshit, the supervisor for the hosting company put me 'on call'.
I was furious and called my boss. This bullshit is something that the Downer would pull, connecting a PSO to a caller who doesn't want to talk to her multiple times and then blaming her for 'failing'. You can't please everyone all the time. The Saturday supervisor doesn't pull that crap, normally. I couldn't understand what was going on. The Boss tried his usual round of reassuring lies; everyone gets treated the same, no, they are not deliberately connecting you with the worst asshole available. I kept my mouth shut, there is no reason for me to point out how statistically impossible it is for a business with hundreds of phone lines to only have this one jerk available for me to be connected to me for half an hour. I just told him that the last week had been strange. He responded by telling me that my favorite supervisor at the hosting company has been drinking the Kool-aid at work and is starting to engage the same sort of harassment that the Downer uses.
Oh, say it ain't so. If that is true, my life is going to really suck. Part of the way every PSO keeps her call length average up is by the supervisor connecting her to her regulars on a nightly basis. The Downer does the opposite, he makes sure that a PSO isn't connected to her regulars. If my favorite supervisor starts doing the same thing, my call time average will hit the floor and I won't be able to predict how much money I will make during the week. I can't imagine that this is effective for the hosting company, either. On the other hand, the Downer has been getting away with it for years, according to my boss, so it must work at some level.
I am going to work this week and see what happens. If this continues, I may have to find another company to work for and I am not looking forward to that.
Saturday, I was placed on call after the first half hour on my shift. My first caller disconnected the call when someone knocked on his front door. I heard him answer the door before hanging up so I believe him when he said he had to go. Not there was anything I could do about it if he had been lying to me. Then I was connected to the same Short Timer over and over again. He used a different name and location for each call but he had a very distinctive speaking voice and asked the same questions each time. He seemed to be very concerned about the age of the PSO and would not say why. After 5 rounds of this bullshit, the supervisor for the hosting company put me 'on call'.
I was furious and called my boss. This bullshit is something that the Downer would pull, connecting a PSO to a caller who doesn't want to talk to her multiple times and then blaming her for 'failing'. You can't please everyone all the time. The Saturday supervisor doesn't pull that crap, normally. I couldn't understand what was going on. The Boss tried his usual round of reassuring lies; everyone gets treated the same, no, they are not deliberately connecting you with the worst asshole available. I kept my mouth shut, there is no reason for me to point out how statistically impossible it is for a business with hundreds of phone lines to only have this one jerk available for me to be connected to me for half an hour. I just told him that the last week had been strange. He responded by telling me that my favorite supervisor at the hosting company has been drinking the Kool-aid at work and is starting to engage the same sort of harassment that the Downer uses.
Oh, say it ain't so. If that is true, my life is going to really suck. Part of the way every PSO keeps her call length average up is by the supervisor connecting her to her regulars on a nightly basis. The Downer does the opposite, he makes sure that a PSO isn't connected to her regulars. If my favorite supervisor starts doing the same thing, my call time average will hit the floor and I won't be able to predict how much money I will make during the week. I can't imagine that this is effective for the hosting company, either. On the other hand, the Downer has been getting away with it for years, according to my boss, so it must work at some level.
I am going to work this week and see what happens. If this continues, I may have to find another company to work for and I am not looking forward to that.
Saturday, April 7, 2012
Stigma
I watch Harry's Law. I happen to like legal shows and I like the actress, Kathy Bates. I even like the character she portrays despite her character being a Republican. At least, she's a Republican I can understand and respect. The last episode I watched caught my attention because it deals with a woman who was terminated unfairly because she once considered sex entertainment as a way to make extra money in a financial crisis. The character portrayed on the show did some research, made an audition 'tape' and ultimately, decided against submitting that tape to a website. However, she is still investigated by the police by use of a camera drone. How the police came to investigate her is never clarified. I believe the plot point was 'anonymous tip'. She is terminated from her position as an elementary school teacher and takes the school district to court. This work of fiction is loosely based on the experiences of a real person, I believe. A schoolteacher was removed from her position for revealing in a response to an op-ed piece that she had been a prostitute in the past. The worst part of her story is this; I read about that schoolteacher in a slideshow article on teacher/student scandals. Her story of being a former sex worker was lumped together with women who had sex with underage partners. In the mind of the author, the crime of being a sex worker was as heinous as being an adult who sexually exploited children.
The message seems to be if a woman markets her sexuality (or even thinks about doing so) to survive, she is forever tainted. Not just tainted, corrupted, and no longer safe to be around. I find that belief a frightening concept. Being a phone sex operator, actress, performer, whatever, has changed me. For one thing, I am much more comfortable talking about sex and using language most people would find shocking. I will admit that the shocking part wasn't exactly a huge leap for me. I have made a point of being verbally aggressive since I was a teenager and I discovered that using explicit language was one way of doing so. I have also become much more aware of what men find sexually exciting and boy, do women's magazine get it wrong. No wonder men look at them, befuddled, and wonder what the hell is going on. At the same time, it is men who think that a woman who markets her sexuality is somehow fundamentally different from a 'normal' woman. That's why Mr. Gross-and-Boring called me a 'sexy bitch' to get me involved in his fantasy. A compliment I am sure he would not use with a woman he knows in his day to day life and would not consider appropriate under those circumstances. The other way it has changed me? I have become even more circumspect concerning the people I allow into my personal life. I am acutely aware of the stigma attached to my profession (and the fetish) and I choose not to deal with it when I am not working.
As a culture, America doesn't seem to believe in giving people second chances. We appear to enjoy judging people at the worst possible moment in their lives and wrapping that moment around them like a shroud. This really hit home with my last customer service job. The interviewer made a point of telling me that the business was 'felony friendly'. Having only just heard the term a few days before, I was a little slow on the uptake in my response. I shrugged and said that whether or not they hired felons wasn't an issue for me. I thought she was asking if I was okay with the idea of working with felons. Wrong. She was asking if I had failed to fill out the application completely. There was an office manager at that company who was a former felon and loved to remind employees how difficult it was for former felons to find employment. She used that line on me once, I reminded her that I wasn't, she responded with "Then, what the hell are you doing here?" Most of my co-workers constantly complained of not being able to find jobs because so many doors were closed to them as felons. These are people who have paid their debt to society. Officially, they are done. Yet, our culture will not give them the clean slate the law allows.
For women who work in the sex entertainment industry, it seems to be worse. There are people who think that I am fundamentally different from them because of what I do for a living. Whether they believe that I possess some innate character flaw that is the reason that I ended up a PSO or the taint is something that happened to me because of my job is not clear. I just wish that people would please keep in mind that the most I ever do with a caller is talk. To be honest, most of what I actually do with a caller is listen. In any other circumstances, these would be considered admirable traits and they are the reason I am a good PSO. I perform, using my voice and my imagination. A web cam performer, a porn actress, an adult model, an adult dancer, a sex worker; they are all performing too. Even if they enjoy what they do, they are performing as part of their job. Real sex does not look or sound like performance sex. Sorry to disappoint, guys. It seems to me that men really want to believe that there are women somewhere in the world who will fuck any man at any time any way the man (or men) in question want with no thought to her own health, safety, or happiness. Sort of a secret league of international nymphomaniacs who get together periodically to decide on which handful of poor schmucks they all agree NOT TO FUCK and every straight man on the planet fears his name is at the top of the list.
Guess what, boys? There actually is a list and being an asshole is the fastest way to get on it and stay there.
The message seems to be if a woman markets her sexuality (or even thinks about doing so) to survive, she is forever tainted. Not just tainted, corrupted, and no longer safe to be around. I find that belief a frightening concept. Being a phone sex operator, actress, performer, whatever, has changed me. For one thing, I am much more comfortable talking about sex and using language most people would find shocking. I will admit that the shocking part wasn't exactly a huge leap for me. I have made a point of being verbally aggressive since I was a teenager and I discovered that using explicit language was one way of doing so. I have also become much more aware of what men find sexually exciting and boy, do women's magazine get it wrong. No wonder men look at them, befuddled, and wonder what the hell is going on. At the same time, it is men who think that a woman who markets her sexuality is somehow fundamentally different from a 'normal' woman. That's why Mr. Gross-and-Boring called me a 'sexy bitch' to get me involved in his fantasy. A compliment I am sure he would not use with a woman he knows in his day to day life and would not consider appropriate under those circumstances. The other way it has changed me? I have become even more circumspect concerning the people I allow into my personal life. I am acutely aware of the stigma attached to my profession (and the fetish) and I choose not to deal with it when I am not working.
As a culture, America doesn't seem to believe in giving people second chances. We appear to enjoy judging people at the worst possible moment in their lives and wrapping that moment around them like a shroud. This really hit home with my last customer service job. The interviewer made a point of telling me that the business was 'felony friendly'. Having only just heard the term a few days before, I was a little slow on the uptake in my response. I shrugged and said that whether or not they hired felons wasn't an issue for me. I thought she was asking if I was okay with the idea of working with felons. Wrong. She was asking if I had failed to fill out the application completely. There was an office manager at that company who was a former felon and loved to remind employees how difficult it was for former felons to find employment. She used that line on me once, I reminded her that I wasn't, she responded with "Then, what the hell are you doing here?" Most of my co-workers constantly complained of not being able to find jobs because so many doors were closed to them as felons. These are people who have paid their debt to society. Officially, they are done. Yet, our culture will not give them the clean slate the law allows.
For women who work in the sex entertainment industry, it seems to be worse. There are people who think that I am fundamentally different from them because of what I do for a living. Whether they believe that I possess some innate character flaw that is the reason that I ended up a PSO or the taint is something that happened to me because of my job is not clear. I just wish that people would please keep in mind that the most I ever do with a caller is talk. To be honest, most of what I actually do with a caller is listen. In any other circumstances, these would be considered admirable traits and they are the reason I am a good PSO. I perform, using my voice and my imagination. A web cam performer, a porn actress, an adult model, an adult dancer, a sex worker; they are all performing too. Even if they enjoy what they do, they are performing as part of their job. Real sex does not look or sound like performance sex. Sorry to disappoint, guys. It seems to me that men really want to believe that there are women somewhere in the world who will fuck any man at any time any way the man (or men) in question want with no thought to her own health, safety, or happiness. Sort of a secret league of international nymphomaniacs who get together periodically to decide on which handful of poor schmucks they all agree NOT TO FUCK and every straight man on the planet fears his name is at the top of the list.
Guess what, boys? There actually is a list and being an asshole is the fastest way to get on it and stay there.
Wednesday, April 4, 2012
Hang up @ Hello
I keep a log book of my calls. I have mentioned this before and explained why it is important for a PSO to do so. What I have not mentioned before, in any great detail, is how many hang ups I get. The hosting service does not have individual extensions for PSOs so callers have to find an operator they like by the 'catch and release' method. If they like my voice (or recognize my voice and like me) after I say 'hello', we start talking. I am excluding Lazy Fuckers and Silent Callers from this explanation. Those assholes operate under an entirely different set of rules. If the caller doesn't like the sound of my voice or recognizes the sound of my voice and doesn't like me, he hangs up. Trust me when I say this is a very effective method of getting rid of Short Timers like the Officious Little Prick or Who Dis. Both of them need to burn in a special circle of hell while buggering each other, as far as I am concerned. Who Dis demolished my call average one afternoon before I learned to just not play along with the fucker. Whatever he is looking for, I am not that PSO. I just let him know that right away by demanding that he give me a name before I answer any questions.
What it comes down to is this; I get hung up on a lot. During training, it was made very clear that this is normal and to not take it personally. The first few weeks, it was hard not to when I had the Downer screeching into my ear every time a caller hung up on me. It seems no one told the Downer not to take hang ups personally. This was before I learned to avoid the disagreeable fuck. The Downer demands that every PSO on his shift give 100% all the time with every call. Yeah, right. Not going to happen. I'm not going to 'give it my all' to a caller on a shitty cell phone, or a caller who has me on speakerphone. Listening to myself while I'm performing is too damn distracting. I think I sound like an idiot and I don't like the sound of my own voice (too Midwestern). Obviously, callers don't share my opinion, otherwise I wouldn't have a job but, I'm not going to put up with being on speakerphone. I'm not going to put a lot of effort into trying to get a long call out of a notorious Short Timer. If a caller has a track record of hanging up on me after 3-4 minutes, he's not worth my time. Talking to him will literally cost me money. (On a side note; I just managed to wrangle a 10 minute call out of Diaperboy, a recent edition to the Short Timer list since he started asking PSOs to help him advertise his freaking website) I'm not going to put a lot of effort into talking to a caller I don't like, though usually my reason for not liking a caller is because he's a Short Timer. The notable exception is Mr Gross-and-Boring. He is not a Short Timer but, I don't like the way he talks about sex or how pushy he is so I won't talk to him. I won't put any effort into a call with a caller who wants a mommy/son incest fantasy, a rape fantasy or a pedophile fantasy. I like to make it clear from the beginning that these types of role play leave me cold. Not sexy at all, assholes, and I don't care if this is an 'anything goes' line. If you want a PSO who can pretend that shit is sexy, you need to find one who is a much better performer than I am. I can handle just about any fetish under the sun except the ones that involve non-consent. Being a Domme does not mean that I have any interest in non-consensual sex.
One of the worst fantasies I have ever been asked to perform is also one of the most bizarre; the man wanted a Mommy/son incest fantasy with a twist, the 'mommy' is a transsexual presenting her adult son with a 10 year old boy as a birthday present. The first time I talked to this caller, I just let him talk and kept telling him I was having a hard time picturing his fantasy. The asshole kept talking until his time ran out. The second time, I kept asking him questions until he got frustrated and hung up. Now, I just tell him that I'm 'just not into it' and he hangs up. The ultimate fantasy of phone sex is that the PSO is 'really into' the callers' fantasy. Most callers get violently upset if they realize that the PSO is just performing. They don't want to think about the fact that the PSO is being paid for her participation unless part of their fantasy is forcing the PSO to participate.
When a caller hangs up on me after hearing me say hello, I don't take it personally, anymore. There are times when I wish I could ask him what the hell he is looking for or why a woman saying 'hello' is insufficient. One of my regulars, the Romantic, hates the way I answer when I am connected and says so every time we speak. He points out that most other PSOs start out by giving their name and a brief description so a caller can decide whether or not he wants to speak with her without any effort on his part. He tries to order me to change my behavior to make things easier for him. I tell him to go to hell, every time. I find it astonishing that callers think they can order me to change my behavior simply for their convenience (we haven't even gotten to their fantasy) and expect to be obeyed. Yet, it happens every day I work.
Hey Assholes! In case I was not clear, you do not get to decide how I do my job. I am doing just fine without your oh so helpful suggestions. Please exercise the right to keep your opinions to yourself.
What it comes down to is this; I get hung up on a lot. During training, it was made very clear that this is normal and to not take it personally. The first few weeks, it was hard not to when I had the Downer screeching into my ear every time a caller hung up on me. It seems no one told the Downer not to take hang ups personally. This was before I learned to avoid the disagreeable fuck. The Downer demands that every PSO on his shift give 100% all the time with every call. Yeah, right. Not going to happen. I'm not going to 'give it my all' to a caller on a shitty cell phone, or a caller who has me on speakerphone. Listening to myself while I'm performing is too damn distracting. I think I sound like an idiot and I don't like the sound of my own voice (too Midwestern). Obviously, callers don't share my opinion, otherwise I wouldn't have a job but, I'm not going to put up with being on speakerphone. I'm not going to put a lot of effort into trying to get a long call out of a notorious Short Timer. If a caller has a track record of hanging up on me after 3-4 minutes, he's not worth my time. Talking to him will literally cost me money. (On a side note; I just managed to wrangle a 10 minute call out of Diaperboy, a recent edition to the Short Timer list since he started asking PSOs to help him advertise his freaking website) I'm not going to put a lot of effort into talking to a caller I don't like, though usually my reason for not liking a caller is because he's a Short Timer. The notable exception is Mr Gross-and-Boring. He is not a Short Timer but, I don't like the way he talks about sex or how pushy he is so I won't talk to him. I won't put any effort into a call with a caller who wants a mommy/son incest fantasy, a rape fantasy or a pedophile fantasy. I like to make it clear from the beginning that these types of role play leave me cold. Not sexy at all, assholes, and I don't care if this is an 'anything goes' line. If you want a PSO who can pretend that shit is sexy, you need to find one who is a much better performer than I am. I can handle just about any fetish under the sun except the ones that involve non-consent. Being a Domme does not mean that I have any interest in non-consensual sex.
One of the worst fantasies I have ever been asked to perform is also one of the most bizarre; the man wanted a Mommy/son incest fantasy with a twist, the 'mommy' is a transsexual presenting her adult son with a 10 year old boy as a birthday present. The first time I talked to this caller, I just let him talk and kept telling him I was having a hard time picturing his fantasy. The asshole kept talking until his time ran out. The second time, I kept asking him questions until he got frustrated and hung up. Now, I just tell him that I'm 'just not into it' and he hangs up. The ultimate fantasy of phone sex is that the PSO is 'really into' the callers' fantasy. Most callers get violently upset if they realize that the PSO is just performing. They don't want to think about the fact that the PSO is being paid for her participation unless part of their fantasy is forcing the PSO to participate.
When a caller hangs up on me after hearing me say hello, I don't take it personally, anymore. There are times when I wish I could ask him what the hell he is looking for or why a woman saying 'hello' is insufficient. One of my regulars, the Romantic, hates the way I answer when I am connected and says so every time we speak. He points out that most other PSOs start out by giving their name and a brief description so a caller can decide whether or not he wants to speak with her without any effort on his part. He tries to order me to change my behavior to make things easier for him. I tell him to go to hell, every time. I find it astonishing that callers think they can order me to change my behavior simply for their convenience (we haven't even gotten to their fantasy) and expect to be obeyed. Yet, it happens every day I work.
Hey Assholes! In case I was not clear, you do not get to decide how I do my job. I am doing just fine without your oh so helpful suggestions. Please exercise the right to keep your opinions to yourself.
Tuesday, April 3, 2012
Surprise!
Someone tried to hijack my blogger account. I think I am in shock. Why the hell would anyone care?
Sunday, April 1, 2012
Oh Fuck
There is a guy who calls in and tells this horrible tale of woe. He was born with a disability and then developed another, horrible, debilitating illness as an adult. His brother died of cancer. He is estranged from the rest of his family, etc. Talking to him is like listening to a bad soap opera. I keep waiting for the next meteor strike. Believe it or not, I have enjoyed talking to this man on occasion. Too bad I figured out what his other little trick is.
Tale of Woe is also the Travel Agent. Dammit. I have written about this jerk before; the caller I thought had a stewardess fantasy and turned out to be an 'Of course, you want to meet me so I can fuck you" fantasy. I suspect that, in the past, he has been very careful about mixing his two personas with the same person. I think he just got a little confused tonight. Or was trying to push the two with me because I threatened to report him to the monitor when he started that Travel Agent bullshit. Either way, I'm kind of disappointed. As Tale of Woe, he is fun to talk to. He spreads a little misery but, his stories about his father are funny as hell. As the Travel Agent, he's just a Short Timer asshole who needs to be avoided and will eventually get himself banned from the hosting service. When a caller manages to piss off a monitor, the caller better think about finding a new phone sex service. They are not a forgiving bunch and some of them are very protective of the PSOs call time average because it affects their bottom line.
Cost us money, man, and you are OUT.
Tale of Woe is also the Travel Agent. Dammit. I have written about this jerk before; the caller I thought had a stewardess fantasy and turned out to be an 'Of course, you want to meet me so I can fuck you" fantasy. I suspect that, in the past, he has been very careful about mixing his two personas with the same person. I think he just got a little confused tonight. Or was trying to push the two with me because I threatened to report him to the monitor when he started that Travel Agent bullshit. Either way, I'm kind of disappointed. As Tale of Woe, he is fun to talk to. He spreads a little misery but, his stories about his father are funny as hell. As the Travel Agent, he's just a Short Timer asshole who needs to be avoided and will eventually get himself banned from the hosting service. When a caller manages to piss off a monitor, the caller better think about finding a new phone sex service. They are not a forgiving bunch and some of them are very protective of the PSOs call time average because it affects their bottom line.
Cost us money, man, and you are OUT.
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